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When Nancy Friday began her research for My Mother/My Self in the early 1970s, no work existed that explored the unique interaction between mother and daughter. Today psychotherapists throughout the world acknowledge that if women are to be able to love without possessing, to find work that fulfills them, and to discover their full sexuality, they must first acknowledge th.more
Published September 8th 1997 by Delta
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Best Relationship Non-Fiction
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Novels about Motherhood
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Jul 19, 2011M rated it did not like it · review of another edition
Crappy book. Too many generalizations. Too many false dilemma fallacies (http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallac.).
Relationship dynamics: This book's psychology is outdated. No wonder so many women who tried reading this book (and the author included) devolved into a self-blaming manner of thinking about mother-daughter relationship dynamics. The author's lack of optimism bleeds through. Also, I particularly disliked how the author pushed the concept of 'if a daughter feels inadequacies about he.more
Had enough issues with my mother - stopped after the 2nd chapter so I wouldn't develop any more.
helped me work out relationship with my own mom, find forgiveness &
understanding.
For some it may take courage to read this book with an open mind. A person's unique experiences may not relate to all of the stories told by the author, but I believe that if you either had a mother or are a mother, you will find something familiar here. Sep 25, 2007Avital rated it
Can you handle the truth? Can you admit that your mother isn't and wasn't perfect, that her love for you isn't and wasn't perfect? Can you not only admit it but be okay with it? Can you face the grownup reality that you aren't perfect either, and.more ![]()
Shelves: non-fiction
Mothers, daughters and their complex relationships, expectations and similarities. A little out-dated, as it speaks about a generation before mine but it relates to mine-as being daughters in many aspects as well. The book is based on many interviews, so it's real, but today, as a mother, I can relate to some issues and not to others. For instance, I would never feel jealousy regarding my daughter. I'm too much of a proud mother to feel this way. Jan 23, 2009April rated it liked it
But as for another issue, the one of references,.more
Recommended to April by: Linda Smith
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Mar 23, 2014Ana rated it really liked it
In all honesty, I struggled between 3 and 4 stars, but I settled for 4 because I thoroughly enjoyed the book and because there are some important lessons to be drawn fom it still, especially with respect to mother-daughter competition, the child-rearing consequences of living in a society that still values men more than women, as well as the relationships between women.
In some respects, however,I believe the book ventured down a couple of dangerous slippery slopes. It just isn't the complex, com.more
Nov 21, 2011Diane Nagatomo rated it it was amazing
I recently came across a tattered copy at the JALT 'Books Doing Good' table and decided to reread this book. I first read it in 1980 or so, and was completely blown away by how 'right' Nancy Friday got the complicated mother-daughter relationship. Rereading it 30 years later, I was wondering if it would give me insight to being on the other side of the coin--now I am the MOTHER with a daughter. Although some things still hold true, we are living in a completely different era, and the daughters o.more
Oct 01, 2011Susan Clark-cook rated it really liked it
This is a book of revelations, and a book that many daughter's (and mother's) could benefit by reading. It talks about and takes a psychological look at how we are like our mother's and why it is so hard to accept or realize that. It also attempts to engage one in self discovery and how we form our identity. As a psychologist I have recommended this book to many young women struggling with their mom's, having a hard time understanding them, and even having a love/hate affair and not knowing why..more
May 07, 2011Elaine Mccain rated it really liked it
When this was published (1977), I tried to read it. I couldn't handle it. Now as the mother of an adult daughter and as a daughter with a life-long conflicting relationship her mother AND writing a book about single parenting, I thought I should try again. The book may be dated in places, but the concepts still present a thoughtful challenge. I do have a tendency to stop and get back to work on my book, but I won't give up. For those daughters of any age who do not understand their relationship.more
This book didn't give me any insight into my relationship with my mother. Instead, it made me feel that I've been a terrible mother to my own daughters. As it didn't seem to offer insight into how I could improve the situation, I decided it was unhealthy for me to continue reading and I returned it to the library.
Holy smokes.this is deep stuff. I'm reading this extremely slow. I'm mean REALLY slow. Just in the first page I realized that I need therapy.NOW. Don't read it if you're not ready to accept that you ARE like YOUR mother. Yikes!
Nov 12, 2016MizzSandie rated it did not like it · review of another edition
Shelves: please-be-over-soon, read-in-danish, psychology, dissappointed, no-thank-you, youre-doing-it-wrong, facepalm-cringe-eye-roll-sigh, what-a-waste-of-time, authors-and-series-i-wont-revisit, i-reviewed-this
I read this many years ago and dont remember much other than that I didn't like it. As I flip through its pages I start to remember why: it was heavily Freudian as in everything, all we are, feel and do is rooted in childhood and our relationships with our parents. In this case the mother. Every problem you have, it is
I just happen to disagree with much Freudian theory as much as there is surely some truth to some of it. I just.more
This is a book that I have left out for years to read and re-read. Having loss my mom at 12, this book serves as continuing therapy. It has reinstated that my thoughts and feelings are shared by others like me. There are not only words on the pages of this book, but also kinder feelings, life events , disappointments, guilt, bad decisions and questions that have lived in my heart for so long.
It reminds me that I am a member of a big club that I would rather not be a part of. If you have loss a m.more
I ended up skimming the second half of the book. Picked it up to better understand my daughter who has come of age and is in college. So it was helpful in some ways, but the book seems to be primarily about sex. I looked up Nancy Friday and learned she was a Feminist sex expert so that made sense, but I didn't realize that going in. I am interested in that aspect of relationship, but that is only one part. Also, I did feel she kept blaming her mother for her self, even though she tried to rectif.more
Whilst I felt there were some really quite interesting and relevant points raised here, the old-fashioned thinking and out dated social norms almost irradiated any validity of them.
I sped read/skimmed the last 100 pages. I couldn't take any more! I think I will go back to the places where I feel she was touching upon something, and write about how that applies to me, and forget the things she spoke about that I believe to be totally irrelevant/inconsequential now. (I hope!) Or perhaps re-read i.more
Apr 15, 2015Bethany rated it did not like it
I had to give up on this one. I only made it to page 150. I grabbed it for 75 cents out of sheer curiosity. I don't think any parent/child relationship is cut and dry. While reading this, I had the feeling of, 'It doesn't matter what you do. You are going to mess them up anyway.' Honestly, this was a reminder of WHY I refuse to read parenting books! Just do the best you can and hopefully it will all work out!
Jul 22, 2011Ronald Wise rated it it was ok · review of another edition
I was spurred to purchase and first read this book in 1981 by Marilyn French's The Women's Room, which I also re-read recently. Once again, I was disappointed with this one in comparison to The Women's Room. As non-fiction, I found the organization of the ideas and research references difficult to follow, and often found when I finished a page that I had only moved my eyes over the words without taking in any of the content.
Terribly outdated. Don't think it has much to say to the younger generation now, for whom all mommies are expected to be 'yummy mummies' and be hot and sexy days after giving birth. The Madonna/whore choice seems to have swung in the opposite direction since the time Friday wrote this. Probably was a seminal work (ha ha) at the time, but now it's just not relevant.
i read this in the late 80's. i was entirely too pissed off to make any connections. i mean, it kind of spoke to me because my mom used to be a real asshole, but we're not blood related. i have no information about the one i am related to, so the 'symbiotic' analysis left me chaffed. Jan 06, 2016J rated it liked it
all in all, ech.
Shelves: read-in-2016, usa, 1970-1979, non-fiction
These stories were OK, but at some points I felt like the authors were blaming the mother for everything. It would be an element of the author's life that was obviously the fault of someone or something other than the mom, and yet. the mom is the answer! This didn't help me. It made me feel like a whiny complainer, and I don't need that.
Oct 27, 2009Michelle rated it it was amazing
Finally finished reading the second half! I will definitely go back and read this again - there's so much in it that perhaps I wasn't 'ready' for the first time. This book really helped me explore my feelings regarding my childhood and why I still struggle today. I highly recommend it for any woman.
Mar 14, 2012Duygu Ozmekik rated it it was amazing · review of another edition
Libro Mi Madre Yo Misma Pdf Gratis
Incredible book! Every daughter on earth should read it. The chapters in the book:
1) Mother love 2)A time to be close 3)A time to let go 4)Body image and menstruation 5)Competition 6)The other girls 7) Surrogates and models 8) Men the mystery 9) The loss of virginity 10) The single years 11) Marriage: the return to symbiosis 12) A mother dies. A daughter is born. The cycle repeats.
Feb 06, 2016Fishface rated it really liked it
An excellent book that left a great impression on me. Examines the very deep and complicated subject of mother-daughter relationships without ever getting bogged down. Very autobiographical but makes an effort to cover universal issues.
Dec 14, 2013L rated it liked it
It's a little old but some things are still relevant today. Intetesting read but wouldn't take it too literal since many stories/points don't pertain to everyone. Take what you can out of it & move on.
Apr 02, 2008Paige rated it liked it
Entertaining psycho-babble, freudian based. The whole book is a compendium of letters and stories from ms. friday's patients or readers about their sex lives and how things stem from their relationship w/their mama.
I was able to better reflect on myself, my relationship with my mother, my childhood, and many of my anxieties while reading this book. Read with an open mind but do consider the different societal dynamics of the time; there are a number of outdated modes of thought expressed by the author.
Mar 30, 2008Satia rated it did not like it · review of another edition
I couldn't finish it. I read it when I was a teenager and I guess I was too young to realize how completely irrelevant this book is to my experience. For a full commentary (not really a review):
http://satia.blogspot.com/2009/02/my-.
Good, symbolic of it's time. My mother was jealous, favored my sister, sad for we could never acknowledge a problem between us. I do understand, she was chasing Women's Lib. I have son's, open and honest communication . the gens are changing.
Mi Madre Yo Misma Pdf Gratis
I NEVER read these types of books. This one was interesting but outdated. It doesn't pertain to my relationship with my mother but I know people who would read it and see their relationship with their mother in there.
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Nancy Colbert Friday was an American author who wrote on the topics of female sexuality and liberation.
“Our feelings about menstruation are the image of what it is to be a woman in this culture. While menstruation and the fear of revealing evidence of loss of body control bear possibilities of humiliation for women of which men are not aware, it is humiliating too to be that sex whose voice and presence carry less significance. It is humiliating to speak the same words as a man and have his heard, and not yours. It is humiliating to feel invisible when God gave you a body as solid as his. It is humiliating that women are accorded little dignity unless they are married. We twist these humiliations around, of course, and say it is glorious to have a man fight our battles for us, put us on a pedestal, take care of us. It is, if you enjoy being dependent on someone else.”
“The primary rule is always that a mother can’t go wrong, ever, by encouraging her child after age one and a half to be as individuated and separated as possible. If she was not as good a mother before as she would like to have been, she must get over her guilty desires to overcompensate, and place herself on the side of the child’s developing” More quotes…
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